crazy coupon lady

make sure you save money, not spend even more!

i am happy to say that i am again enjoying the world of couponing, after recovering from a total FAIL! i began couponing with the intent to mimic the people i had seen on reality tv. i now realize that, for the average person, it is more than ridiculous to attempt to pull off those shopping sprees and stockpiles! and not only is it ridiculous to attempt, it can actually cause you to spend more money than you would have without using any coupons at all.

for a while, in the beginning of my coupon endeavors, i thought that i was getting amazing deals! i jumped in to the coupon pile, head first, without checking to see how deep it really was. i soon realized that i was wasting money instead of saving money. i may have never stopped if my husband didn't step in! he told me that i needed to show him the math so that we could see exactly how much we were saving, in order for him to continue on with a particular deal i wanted to get. i was horrified to see that i would have ended up losing money on that particular "deal". once that happened, it made me question all i thought i had done right.

so here are some things to consider when jumping into the coupon pile:

• first, always do the math ON PAPER! see exactly what you are spending and saving.
• consider all of the expenses, inconveniences, and outright catastrophies that do and could go with the WHOLE PROCESS! i mean, stuff you definitely aren't thinking of yet: coupon site fees, printer paper and ink, storage or the lack thereof which usually causes lots of tension with the husband, and even getting a virus on your computer that causes it to be a total loss! Yes, i'm serious, and that one is incredibly hard to admit! and never rule out the possibility of fake coupons. i've seen the embarrassment and trouble it can cause!
• evaluate if you are honestly getting good deals on things you ALREADY use, or if you are getting sucked in to the habit and spending money on things you don't really need just for the sake of a fun coupon experience!
• evaluate if you honestly have the storage for bulk purchases or if you are causing a strain on your family! plus, you need to make sure that you can use all that bulk stuff before the expiration dates!
• compare in-store "deals" to other stores. don't go to Winn Dixie for a catchy special if it is cheaper at it's regular price in Walmart.
• look in as many local grocery store papers as you can. decide if one amazing deal is worth shopping at that store for the week, or if you could just make an extra trip. decide if all your extra trips to various stores are worth it at all, and sometimes they are but sometimes they're not!
• try to clip as many old fashioned coupons as possible!! they're free and usually have lots of grocery-food items, plus fast food restaurant coupons as well!
• always combine your coupons with in-store deals.
• organize your coupons according to expiration dates!
• pass the savings along! if you see something that you wouldn't use but that someone you love would, clip and give it to them... even if they think you are a crazy coupon lady!

i am done with being sucked into "great deals" that i just can't pass up and have no where to put them once i get home and probably won't use before the expiration date and would have never bought anyway if there wasn't a coupon to put the idea in my head!!!!!

i now stick with simple, not out of my way, coupon clipping. i clip only what is realistic for me to buy.

be smart and make coupons SAVE you money, not cause you trouble!

the organized life...of my alter ego

what reality really looks like

meals planned, coupons and shopping lists organized, laundry folded and put away, clothes ironed, house clean, homework checked, and kids in bed on time. all of this with clean hair and a fresh face...
dates with the husband are priority, and there's even time left just for me!

not in this life! 

REAL LIFE looks a little bit different...
the last time i did something "just for me" happened to be a parenting Bible study! imagine that?!
the only dates i've had with the husband for the past few years have pretty much consisted of going to lunch or dinner and coming right back so that we could get our oldest from school or put the kids to bed.
the only meals i've planned in the last six months have been when choosing which frozen dinner fits my mood!
oh and my recent laundry schedule is bringing back, not so fond, memories of when i worked outside the home. i was in so over my head then that i'd either wake up in the middle of the night to do laundry because i realized no one's uniforms were clean; OR i'd throw dirty uniforms in the dryer with two dryer sheets to "freshen them up" because i hadn't realized that there were no more clean!! AND my husband did all of his own laundry plus 70% of the cooking back then. it was insanity. i'm not quite there again, thankfully!

i am the type of person who does think it is important for my home to be clean and orderly. i feel like i do my best at being a wife and mom when my days are organized and on schedule. there was even about a two year period when my home was almost chaos free. almost! and, no, it wasn't before i had kids! it was when i first stopped working outside the home; but before i had my third child! it seems like throwing another baby into the mix, and beginning to homeschool has just put me into a land where i cannot seem to reach my organized self who is now just my alter ego! i am now trying to figure out the best way to deal with this.

i think dealing with the feelings i am having about my now unorganized life will require a few things from me.
i think that i will first have to be honest about how much effort i'm putting in now and how much it will actually require to reach my goals. i think that i'll have to accept that i'm in a season of life that makes my organized fantasy an impossible reality. i will have to let some things go! that means i'll have to be really focused when deciding my priorities; because i don't want to let my own desires climb to the top of the list, while i ignore things that will benefit the entire family. and most of all, i need to put my plans into action! i'm pretty good at planning out, but not as good at following through.

while i have to give myself a "C" for the current state of chaos in my homemaking; i'd like to give myself an "A" for honesty and desire to change! i don't have dreams of being perfect. i really don't. i just want to be my most comfortable me, in my own home!

planning for preschool at home

reviewing my 1st year, with tips for others!

i am approaching the end of my first year of homeschool preschool. Yay, we made it!! we are just a few short months away from starting kindergarten; and i'm so happy that i decided to do "formal" preschool with my son. i feel like i would have much more anxiety about kindergarten if we hadn't. now, i will say, i don't think it is at all necessary to do anything "formal" for your child to learn lots and lots of important things! i did lots of informal teaching with him from the time he could understand me until we started "big boy" preschool at age 4!

so, i'm gonna give myself, along with all the other moms spending quality time communicating with their kids, an "A+"!! i really don't think it's an area that we can fail in. unless our kids have learned to be self-sufficient because we spend our days zoned into our favorite tv shows, then i promise we're all doing a great job in our own ways! 

i have an infant son now, and i honestly don't know if i would have been able to plan and carry out any sort of actual curriculum with my preschooler if my baby had been born any sooner. but, i do think it is very possible, depending on your family schedule and even just your personality. 

i have about 3 years of previous experience working in early childhood education. it did give me a reference point for the way i could go about a preschool experience with my own child; however, i feel strongly that anyone can be successful with planning preschool at home! it's really about your own child. it's that simple.

i started by taking a day to create a list of the things that i knew my child already knew, and/or, needed work with. i then spent a day creating a list of goals for the preschool year. things that were important to me for my child to learn, or begin learning, along with reviewing the things he already knew. after that, i researched preschool and kindergarten "ready lists" to make sure there weren't things that i hadn't thought of to include in our year. and, of course, there were! so, once my final goal list was complete; i began coming up with ways in which to teach everything. i was on a pretty tight budget! i got lots of things from the dollar store! i did make one trip to my local teacher supply store and invested in a couple things that i just couldn't find elsewhere. and, thankfully, a friend invited me to go with her to a homeschool used materials sale!! i also created a "homeschool" folder on my computer with lots of free printables that i have used and plan to use for the next kid! and, of course, i have made Pinterest my best friend for new ideas.

i recently filled out a preschool assessment form (from confessionsofahomeschooler.com) to put our year into perspective. it gave me an idea of what we have actually accomplished this year, as well as what we still need to work on and can focus more on. i'm glad i did this in addition to reviewing my goal list from the beginning of the year. it gave me the realization that there were areas of development that i hadn't even introduced in my teaching so far! i was happy to mark the areas of success from my own goal list, but even happier to see the things i want to incorporate, over the summer, that i hadn't even thought to include in our learning so far! i will admit that i have focused more on academics and less on practical life skills. so i'd probably only be able to give myself a "C+" if i were grading myself on how well my child is prepared for life at his age! but, i'm happy to be honest about this and begin working with him in different areas.

i'm satisfied with my decision to approach preschool with my child in the formal academic manner that i did. i realize we could have been very successful at learning in a more relaxed, going about normal life, kind of way. i just had to choose the way that best suited my child. if you think planning a curriculum would be best for your child; be encouraged that it won't be the hardest thing you've ever done. it will be a joy when it all comes together! even the things you may think turned out as a failure in attempting, will be giving you a priceless chance to get to know your child even better!

Kids: tv, video games, tablets, ipods, and online activity

better safe than sorry

i am constantly working to balance out my love/hate relationship with the opportunities that modern technology affords my children. it seems like there are ten cons for every pro that i could list about (my) children having access to a variety of electronics!

even though i am dealing with two totally different age groups, as i consider this subject; the concerns are the same for both! sure, they are a little more challenging with my teenager than with my soon to be kindergartener...but still ultimately the same. at least one can never accuse me of being easier or more lenient with the other on this issue!

i will say that if it were totally up to me, my kids wouldn't have half the electronics that my husband allows them. but, i am only one of their parents and the decisions are compromised on in this house! so the least i can do is monitor,better yet, RESTRICT!

through some trial and error over the past few years with my step-son, i  have discovered that it is definitely better to be safe than sorry when it comes to all usage of technology. i'm still working it all out! just when i think i am on top of it, i find a whole new slew of things that i didn't even realize needed restricting! seriously, just when i think i've reviewed all the settings and all the apps, i find something that i hadn't noticed yet!
and the same now goes for my little man. i can't believe all the settings he has been smart enough to fool with at his age! i gotta put parent lock codes on everything. at least his messing with things is out of curiosity and wanting to play with buttons instead of purposely trying to go beyond what he is allowed (most of the time!).

but besides monitoring and restricting content, it is also hard to know what is a good amount of time to allow them to use their various devices. i can understand how easy it is, as an adult, to lose track of time and be on the computer much longer than i planned. kids would just play all day if no one stopped them!

ok, so i'm gonna have to give myself a "B-" on this one. i feel the urgency of monitoring the kids, but at the same time i feel like i could be doing better. i don't want to let electronics be my babysitter on a daily basis, ever! and i don't want to continue to feel like i'm constantly missing something i should have noticed sooner. i need to truly preview each new thing before they can play and be very specific with them about the allowed usage of time! and i don't need to be afraid to assert myself as the parent instead of feeling like the bad guy. i'd rather have my kids rolling their eyes because of my restrictions than for me to be balling my eyes out crying over a habit that is now very hard to break or, even worse, if they were to come across content that their eyes could never unsee.

children IN church

i'm fine with my kids, and yours, in church!

 i always face sundays alone since my husband works. even making it there at all is a victory since i've had my littlest son 5 months ago! every Saturday comes with thoughts of Sunday and church. i usually have so many thoughts about church going on in my head at once!

 i think about picking outfits and possibly having to iron them. i think about trying to schedule feeding and morning naps so that my infant is the least cranky possible, i think about how i can manage my infant's morning schedule and make it on time, i think about packing things for each kid to have after church when we spend the rest of the day at my parents' house, and all this is just the pre-church thoughts!

when i think about actually being in service, i think about how much i'm going to have to focus on my kids while trying to worship and fellowship. i do think that it is MY job to focus on them! but let me say a big thank you to all the dedicated and wonderful teachers, workers, and pastors of all children's ministries because i understand that they have their place AND i will say that i have no problem with children's services that are separate from the sanctuary where the adults are...however, my personal preference is for my children to be in "big church" with myself and my family. i also enjoy seeing children of the other parents who choose the same, all around me. 

i am actually going to give myself an "A" for this subject!!!  i would also like to offer my seal of approval for any parent who is keeping their children (of all ages) in church with them, and stepping up to the challenge that it often is (especially with toddlers and teenagers). and i would like to encourage others to do the same. plus, i would like to (lovingly) rebuke anyone who has been negative, either face to face or behind someone's back, about a family choosing for their children to be in the main church service.

ok, so on with the encouragement!... having your children in church with the adults will be a constant work-in-progress. if we adults are still being sanctified, let's not expect the children to behave perfectly! and i guess the encouragement must go hand in hand with the rebuke... so to others who give disapproving glares, i would tell you the same! YOU are still being sanctified, and you can't expect the children to behave perfectly! the toddlers and young children who make noise and wiggle a little in their seats are in training to become still and quiet older children who will be soaking up the Word of God in a few years. and the teenagers who must occasionally be prodded to sit up and pay attention are worth investing into their lives the training required to instill the proper respect and behavior necessary for church attendance.

i'll make a few side notes now. i am still working on keeping track of my kids' whereabouts and behavior before/after church. i would probably give myself an "B+" for this, but ever strive for an "A+". i do not ever approve of children being excessively loud, roudy, or running at church!!! i don't think we should tolerate running and screaming before/after church. and i don't think we should tolerate (especially older kids and teens) talking or laughing during service. it IS church, afterall. i do believe in maintaining lines that warrant discipline versus simple training and patience. and i would definitely be one of those parents giving those disapproving stares upon witnessing such behavior!

but back to reasonable situations... babies especially should never warrant ugly looks or whispers. they're babies afterall! i mean, i won't let mine scream the entire time without taking him out, but i also think we should ignore the baby babble and let it pass. 

so as i look forward to church tomorrow, i look forward to being with my kids, and yours, in service! i hope you will be encouraged to try to keep your kids with you if it's something you've held back on out of fear of what others will think. i also hope you give yourself an "A" for effort, no matter how hard it might actually be! and please be mindful of others who want their children in "big church" even if your choice is a different one.

may it be a blessed day!

food fights

daily battle to put healthy food on the table

my love of food and cooking didn't develop until my first (biological) son was a few months old. at that point, i had been raising my step-son for a little over two years and letting my husband do almost all of the cooking. i had been an only child who was never made to cook, or do anything else around the house either. i did, however, grow up seeing my mother and both grandmothers cook lots of homemade meals! thank goodness for that because i think it helped once i finally started to try and cook things on my own.

so i would watch cooking shows while i nursed my son and i just had to try some of the things that i was learning! once i made my first successful homemade meal, i was hooked! i spent the next four years learning family recipes, collecting cookbooks, and keeping up with weekly meal planning.

fast-forward to another pregnancy, and all of that went out the window! i did keep up with making homemade biscuits and cornbread, because i craved them so much, until i got diagnosed with gestational diabetes :(    all love of food absolutely stopped there. it became way too much to keep up with my special diet and the rest of life, in general. now my baby is approaching five months old and i still can't quite get back into a good routine of planning and following through with a meal schedule that is healthy or homemade.

my goal would be for my cooking habits to closely mimic those of rachael ray or the pioneer woman, but the reality for now is that the meals at my house look more like semi-homemade from sandra lee, on my best days, and something you might even find in honey boo boo's house, on my worst days!

i have to admit that i've resorted to hot pockets and bowls of cereal on some days, but that everything in me is screaming for life to go back to the way it was when i served at least 2 nice meals a day. don't get me wrong, i am never above fast food and junk food, all in moderation. i actually really enjoy it in it's place! but i'm holding on to the silver lining that must be around this dark cloud of life interruptions that have come with pregnancy and new motherhood (again) for me. i just can't pretend to be doing well with this until i am again.

 i did manage to make a completely homemade, however not completely healthy, strawberry dessert for Mother's Day :)  so for now i'm gonna have to give myself another "C". that's pretty much the average between all my "F's" and the few "A's" i'm able to pull off.

bed time...the most dreaded part of my day

i am gonna have to give myself a "C" for the bedtime routines at my house for now! i have a list of excuses
for the chaos surrounding bedtime at my house, as well as not getting the kids into bed any sooner than 15 minutes past their actual bedtime. "my husband gets off late and i want the kids to see daddy" and "i have an infant" are among my favorites! but i have recently decided that it's time for the chaos to stop, and that an earlier and actually enforced bedtime will be in the best interest of the entire family.

i love the thought of bedtime and the quiet that exists at no other time in my home. i so enjoy the conversation, favorite tv shows, and dessert eating with my husband, ALONE! but often times those things are over promised and under delivered because by the time we get the kids to bed (sometimes an hour and a half past bedtime), we are both so tired that we end up taking it out on each other instead of spending our beloved quiet time together.

the dread of bedtime is because of my own lack of time management and follow through. i have got to change some things in my day that put me behind schedule way before bedtime comes! so, on my to do list is: to skip some daytime moments of "down time" with the bigger picture in mind, to set an earlier bedtime for the kids, and to pay attention to the clock, duh! 

while i am looking forward to reaping personal benefits from an earlier, enforced bedtime for my kids, i am anticipating the benefits it will give the kids as well. i know that my children need more rest for their growing bodies and minds. i truly believe that structure affords them greater opportunities to thrive. but mostly, i know that i'm preparing them for living their own adult lives and that i need to set a good example even in the seemingly small details. they are going to need a good point of reference when they're on their own!

hopefully i can update with a progress report that promises a rising grade for the next report card :)